C is for Civility

Civility the root word to civilization, is also the groundwork for a civilization to thrive. It's opposite is rudeness.
Civility is formal politeness and respect, according to Google. Merriam-Webster says it is "polite, reasonable, respectful behavior."

Civility is pretty rare these days. Most of the rising generation are mimicking TV and thinking up zingers rather than thinking of ways to be polite to others. People Troll on Facebook and YouTube just to click on dislike rather than just to let things alone. And they do worse. Basically bullying has become the new sport for a very many people.



Humor today is mostly crass. It includes farting humor, body humor, sex humor, and snarky comebacks. Respect seems to be deemed as old-fashioned. Making-fun rather than having-fun has become the norm.

However, I often wonder if civility is not the real difference between a barbarian and a civilized person.

Think about it.

A polite person asks kindly with 'please' and 'thank you'.

A thug demands with 'gimmie' and 'or else'.

I know, I sound a little extreme, but think about it. When was the last time you watched a comedy that was funny that did not have some kind of zinger or crude joke? And if you had, from what era was it? Was the humor ironic or sarcastic?

I think this is why I like watching old movies. These were intelligent comedies where you had to think to get the joke. Society was expected to rise up rather than the comedy lowering down.

I once saw the move "The Women" in the old black and white. Then I saw the remake. It is amazing to see the differences in behavior of these women. You can tell the heroine by who is civil and who is not. An example.



I had hoped to find the scene where the little girl proves to be more of a lady than the her new stepmother who had broken her parents' marriage. Unfortunately it wasn't available.

I think many people are noticing the depressing drop in civility in our society today. More people are calling for an increase in kindness. I'm posting their links below.

"The Civility Wars" The New Yorker
His site.
"The Meaning of Civility" from the University of Colorado
A civility forecast.
Civility Matters
Civility, Outrage
The Civility Campaign
The Civility Institute

Google it for more.

Civility is a virtue because treating others with respect is the first step towards true equality. Raising people up, not putting people down is what makes a society rise up. Lifting, not condemning. Supporting and helping, not crushing and defeating. The fact is, if you are zinging everyone, eventually no one will trust you not to zig them. You become dangerous as a conversationalist... among other things.

There is a saying I like:

"Kindness Begins with Me."

As for incivility.

Stop it.