The Trouble with Feminism

I would never describe myself as a feminist--at least not the way the world around me describes feminism.
And I know this probably offends a lot of women who are self-declared feminists, because most, if not all, of them tend to think that all women should be feminists.

Here's the thing: the word Feminism invokes a lot of emotional imagery and baggage that has built up over the decades by the examples of many leading feminists. To some people, all feminism means is getting equal pay for equal work. To others is means women are in fact the superior creature, and men should cower before them. After looking at all the arguments over this issue I have come to the conclusion that there are in fact degrees of feminism out there.

For example:
On one end of the spectrum is the Fema-nazi. This is the man-hater (who actually does exist). The woman who rejects all cultural norms in regards to feminine grooming, feminine modesty (that is, sitting close-legged, with an upright posture, rather than slouching like a man-slob), and traditional feminine roles such as motherhood and being a wife.
On the other end of the spectrum is the Masochistic Female. This is the woman who really believes she is subservient to men, will take all kinds of abuse because she believes she deserves it, does not seek education but just wants to make babies--the very thing feminists in any form deplore.

Ok, so what is in the middle? It is a spectrum after all. And like any spectrum there are varying degrees to one extreme or the other. So... this is how I see it.

Fema-nazi--the anti-motherhood, wife-hood, children, and men. See above.
Ultra-feminist--may not be anti-men, but still want to be an Amazon and have it all without being weighed down by traditional motherhood. May like having kids, but they probably have a nanny or send them to day-care because their career is empowering. They feel a sense of identity with their career, and they'd rather see how much they influence the world around them--as just influencing their family is not enough.
Naturalist Feminist--the woman who wants to live as her natural drives guide her, which includes curbing no desire, requires no shaving of any body part, and she does not want to be bound down by cultural norms such as marriage unless it suits her survival needs. She is a logical feminist, with the philosophy "whatever a man can do, I should be able to do also"--including the deplorable stuff such as having irresponsible sex, dressing with as little on as she can get away with, and taking care of ME first. This is the "If it feels natural and gives me pleasure, then it must be right" kind of feminist.

These top three are the major stereotypes that most anti-feminists fear/dislike. I'll tell you why later.

The next group down the spectrum holds less hostility to traditional feminine roles:

Utilitarian Feminist--Like the Naturalist Feminist, she believes that what a man has, she ought to have... with a minor difference. Her focus is not on the sexual aspects, but on the logic of equal opportunity for education and work. Equal pay for equal work mathematically adds up for her. In this case, it is just plain common sense. She doesn't want to be a man, but she wants to take care of her life on fair terms. She may have no other feminist convictions, including about family, sex, or manner of hygiene and dress. To her, those are up to the individual. A lot of women are this kind of feminist. They generally mind their own business and wish others would do the same.
Conservative Feminist--This is the religious woman who believes in what the Utilitarian Feminist believes, but with the stipulation that traditional roles and family are in fact very important. And though they completely support equality in marriage and in life, they also believe that there are things you simply must not do. So free sex is out. Abortion is out. Sending children off to day-care when you are capable of taking care of them yourself is out. That putting career over your family is out. But if need arises and one must work in a job--she wants to be treated fairly and paid well.
Closet Feminist--This is the woman who have no objections to anything that may make her life more pleasant. But she is not going to argue over whether reproductive rights are something important to her. She goes with the flow. She will take what she can get. She is the one who probably feels deep down that life is unfair, and she may have been given the short end of the stick. But not because of genetics. Because human kind is unfair. Because culture makes a lot of silly rules that unfortunately she has to abide by to make her life pleasant. She will probably acknowledge that there are unfair pay rates and jobs between men and women, but she doesn't care to have those jobs that are prestigious because to her that isn't what's important. She likes feminine things, such as the color pink. She likes all the makeup, and the shaving, and the creams, and the hair stuff. She will sing "I Enjoy Being a Girl" from Flower Drum Song. And though the ladies above may like feminine things, she is the one that hardly resents them.
Traditional-All-The-Way--This woman may not consider herself inferior to man, but she is sure that she is an entirely different creature. She may even believe that 'women are angels' that men need to make them better people. These women embrace traditional family, traditional roles, and believe strongly that sexuality has its place--and that place is NOT a matter of public discussion. These woman are staunchly anti-abortion. Any rationalization that may excuse abortion is considered vile and the act of selfishness. To them abortion is murder, and not a female issue at all. These women probably believe the world is going to Hell in a hand basket with the way things are trending.
Masochistic Female--Ah, back full circle. The woman who really thinks she is being forever punished by the original sin of Eve. See the description at the top.

Ok. So, since we are living on planet earth and lists like this are over-simplifications of something a whole lot more complex, I will admit some people are traditional about some things, and liberal about others.

That being said, why I don't see myself as a feminist is that I can range from a Utilitarian Feminist on some days, a Traditional-all-the-way on others, and then be an Ultra-feminist when I am in a bad mood. For example, let's say I'm coping with my menstrual cycle. It is a cycle that sucks, costs a lot of money to deal with, and basically such a bother that I'd almost give my right arm to not have it. I tend to be a bit more anti-men on those days, especially when a man says or does something really, really stupid. Yet, I don't believe in abortion--at all. So when the feminist groups parade around demanding that it is a woman's right to kill her unborn, I cringe. And when feminists demand that people who are anti-abortion are anti-women, well... I want to knock them over the head and shout that the two are unrelated. I mean, I ran across this website that posted a vegan argument against abortion--asking, is not ALL life precious? But we'll save that argument for another day.

So, where do you see yourself on the spectrum?